Pardon Me, I'm a Baby

I have found that one of the commonest things that people recollect after having a newborn baby is how much they change one's life. It is a starker change than almost any other transition in life. The baby comes at some random hour, roughly predicted by a due date, and from that moment on, life has a different focus. It is necessarily different, unless one neglects the child. It is true particularly for the new mommy if she breastfeeds, who now must attend to baby's needs at least every two hours. Baby must be held at all times when he is awake. Diaper changes are in order every few hours with varying frequency. Sleep is inconsistent for baby, and consequently for Mom and Dad. If all this was not enough, there is the creepy reality that this eating, crying, pooping thing is a person, and as time goes on, the creature takes on personality, and he is soaking in the world of his experience left and right, the presentation of which is your (the parent's) responsibility. If it wasn't enough to have to change and feed him, one needs to love him. All this imposes extreme change on the parents. Let's not put a glossy lens on it.

Yet, it would be silly to mope about these changes too much, tough as they may be. My new son may wake up five times a night, require me to change my precious morning routine constantly, and insist that it is a better use of my time to play "bumblebee" (running around the room while holding him and making a buzz noise with my mouth) than do anything else. In moments of reflection, I understand that never would I trade these inconveniences for a life without him. It is no joke that baby's are an inconvenience, but they are a good inconvenience, and not just because of the smile that follows a night with nearly no sleep. Those huge changes and interruptions are good in themselves. They cause me to reflect on who I was before my little son was in my life. How did I spend my time? This little one requires self-giving love. If that is at times a hugely uncomfortable change, perhaps I needed it. Perhaps, before he was born, I was not giving myself in love as fully as I should have been.